It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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