Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
