Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
