did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize