so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
