you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
