He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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