Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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