He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Randomize
