Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
