He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
