Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
