Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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