worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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