Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
