She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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