also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
