Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize