Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm really busy with my period
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