Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
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