Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
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He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
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I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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