Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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