It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
