Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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