Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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