What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
