So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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