very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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