btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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