Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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