Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
