I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
This is my gift to your gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize