After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
