i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
