I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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