I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
