He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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