Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
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