I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
