6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
