Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
