Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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