We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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