Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Drunk is not a location!
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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