Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
