Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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