I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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