There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
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And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
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No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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