Pappa wants mamma naked
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize