On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
