i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize